Bulling

     Seeing as bulling made my school life more difficult than it should have been, I'm surprised at myself that I haven't said anything about this yet.
     I don't know whether its because I see myself as coming from a loving, nurturing home, or whether I am just a general 'good person', but I can honestly say that I have never understood why people feel the need to belittle others to make themselves feel better. Don't get me wrong, I've teased members of my family and extremely close friends about trivial stuff until the cows have come home, but I think when it comes to something like this, I don't think there is the "thin line" between what is acceptable and what isn't. Saying to some you know well, "Boy, you certainly put on a few pounds over the holidays" is a lot different to saying "OMG, look how fat you are".
     The main concern I have with bullying is that those who are the bully never realise how damaging they can really be. I have to be honest, I think I coped with it though school fairly well, considering the amount of kids that get picked on for a few weeks, and then say they want to top themselves. I'm glad I never got to that stage. Bulling affected me by making extremely cynical about every other person on this planet. I went though a phase where I thought my friends were just my friends because they felt sorry for me. It made me doubt who I was as a person. I couldn't understand how peers could treat me so badly, when I'd probably never even uttered two words to them. I was always the weird kid at school, the one who was eccentric, extremely quiet, and wouldn't say boo to a fly. Prime target.
     The problem really started when I reached secondary school. Sure, there was one boy who was mean to me in Primary School, but I soon put a stop to that one by biting his arm so hard that he had the scar for at least ten years (and may even be visible now). Secondary School was just year after year of being bullied. Even up until the age of 18, I'd still be picked on from time to time, still due to my shyness and lack of confidence, but I'd say for the years I was 13 to 16 were the worst, the time where live growing up as a teenager is hard enough.
     Studying behaviour analysis right now, if I were to go back in time, I could probably tell my past self how to stop the bulling without having to physically hurting someone to get them to stop, but then again, a few other absolutely ignorant people laughing at the bullies taunts would be a hard thing to tackle. Seriously though, on this one occasion, in some circumstances, I would say that violence is the answer. After being shouted at numerous times, as well as having your parents informed exactly how you are treating other pupils, and your still bullying me, then I'm sorry, but all the physical pain I've dealt to those who have bullied me in the past, will never match the hurt they caused me back then.
     One girl got a particularly nice bruise on her arm after I told her at least ten times to stop or "she would be sorry". She had her chance. Or a boy who I happened to throw my pencil case at, and hit a very tender area, again after I told him to stop it a good couple of times. He had it coming.
     As with every bad situation in life, you have to make some light of it. Bullying for me has made me realise that I shouldn't care what other people think of me. If I want to dress like a character from a Tim Burton movie, or that I'd rather play games than go get a fake tan, or that I want to listen to that music, then I will. It's also made me feel like a strong, resilient person, who can take crap for ages, but will dish out what you deserve eventually.
     I guess the best thing that I took away from being bullied is to make the best of myself that I possibly can, but most importantly, do better in life than those lowlifes that made your life a living hell for a while. It's nice to see now, that at 21, all those people who had bullied me something chronic in the past don't have the life that I have. They have been too busy trying to make those who are already better than them feel bad about themselves.

Dole

  Ok, so I thought about writing something about this for a while, but I just kept forgetting until somebody posted a comment on Facebook earlier today, stating their annoyances about some people who are claiming dole money. 

  Even as somebody who is 21, still in University, now living back with my parents, and having worked more or less constantly since I was 16, through being in school and University, if it ever came to the time where I was jobless, even though my parents have paid their fair share of taxes, and me graduating next year with a Masters Degree in a stem of Psychology, ultimately leaving me with a fairly decent job, I'd still feel as if I was almost stealing money from others if I ever ended up on the dole. However, it appears to me that there are a lot of people within Britain who frankly, do not give a damn that themselves and their children are being paid for by other people who work damned hard for their money.

   Before I go any further, I have absolutely no problem at all with people who are unable to work due to severe mental/physical problems, I mean, if your wheelchair bound, then your extremely limited to what job you could have anyway, apart from the fact that if would be a real hassle to even get to that job if it wasn't literally on the street you lived on. Saying that, those who don't work because they have back problems and the lark, personally, I think that is stretching it a bit. If you can walk around unassisted to do your shopping, or go out for a day somewhere, then I can't honestly see why these people can't just have a job where they are sat at a desk all day. Surely that isn't going to increase their back problems, sitting down for 8 hours a day......

   One of the issues I have with those who claim dole is that I think that they receive too much money. Currently, during my upcoming University course, I am working at a petrol station that has quite a good little shop attached to it. There are quite a number of people who come into my shop, who I know are unemployed, and buy cigarettes and alcohol. Now, this isn't just a bottle of wine and a ten pack of cigarettes a week or something, we are talking more along the lines of a crate of 15 cans of beer every few days and a pack of 20 cigarettes most days. Ok, I know I'm quite stingy with my money, I don't smoke, and I don't drink more than is healthy in a week, but even working 24 hours a week on a decent wage, I wouldn't be able to afford the things that these people are buying. 

   Both my parents and my Fiancé's parents have always been in a job.  Both my parents went to Technical College, and both have had a steady job since they were 18. Everyone has worked hard to get a job, stay in a job, to be able to support themselves and their family. The most infuriating thing is that there are people who have never worked a single day in their lives who have the same houses as me and my Fiancé's parents. What is the point in working if your just going to end up with the same as people who can't be arsed to work?

   One of my friends' Mother works full time. She is a single Mum. She would get MORE money not working than working where she does now. Surely giving up time and effort to do something other than just sitting about all day should be more rewarding? 

   Recently, I have known a few people who have lost their job through no fault of their own, being let off, as the company couldn't afford to pay them. When going to claim dole, as they would expect to be able to, seeing as they have worked for over 20 years, they were told that they couldn't, as their partner earned more than £150 a week. So, all of those taxes that those people have paid over the years, the thousands upon thousands that they have paid out to others because they are too lazy to do anything with their lives, now that they have no income due to no fault of their own, they don't see a penny of it. It makes me sick.

Materialistic

     I am not what you would call a 'normal' twenty something. I can only stand clothes shopping for a limited amount of time (how my mother manages to do a 6 hour stint of it and not be shattered, I'll never know), most of my wardrobe is filled with jeans and baggy T shirts, and I will never understand the fascination with Ugg boots and Paul's Boutique bags.
     Ok, as a student living on an extremely tight budget for the last three years, my mindset of what is expensive, and what is good value for money might be somewhat skewed, as I feel that even paying £40 for a evening dress is top budget for me, whereas some people would pay at least that. I just bought a new dress for my upcoming birthday, and it cost me £15. It's nothing absolutely spectacular, I'd admit, but it is the sort of style that I go for, and it means that it I only wear it another few times, I haven't really lost out on the money front.
     Some people I know have handbags that cost somewhere in the region of £150. The most expensive bag I have, that was a Christmas gift was £45, and even then, I felt I was pushing it a bit. One of the most expensive items that I wear are my Doc Marten boots, which again, were a Christmas present from my parents, and they were £125. My parents paid £125 for a pair of boots that I wear near enough every day when the weather isn't too warm (which is about 80% of the time where I live), and are going to last me, for what I can imagine, at least 5 years.
     I had a house mate last year, who, to be honest, was extremely well off, and his parents could probably buy him literally anything he asked for. Anyway, he (most probably his parents, he never had a job in his life) would buy a pair of Fred Perry shoes for around 45-50 pounds, wear them for about 6 months, and then chuck them away, just to buy a new pair. He would say to me "Yeah, they only last about 6 months, and then they start to fall apart". Maybe its because I have grown up in a house where your grateful for what you are given, but I certainly wouldn't pay all that money for shoes, just to throw them out months later.
     When I was 16, I asked for an iPod for Christmas. When I came down Christmas morning to find that my parents had bought me a bass guitar and an iPod, I almost felt bad, like when someone praises you for doing something that you never did. I still use that iPod. I still use that guitar. Some people would have gone through three by now.
     One thing that I really can't understand is high fashion. Considering I took Textiles for a GCSE, I sure hated the fashion industry. It has never made sense in my mind why people would pay three, four five, six hundred pounds for a little black dress from Calvin Klein or Gucci, or whatever, when some other designer can make basically the same dress, out of the same material, and charge something like £50. I think that those people who do buy top range stuff like that often are either one of two people: have more money than sense, or, have such low self esteem that they have to have something really expensive on them to make them feel good. I admit, some people wouldn't pay £125 for a pair of Doc Martens, but its not like they look like a lot of other stuff on the market out there. If you showed me a Gucci bag and a bag from, say a high street store, I probably couldn't tell you which one was which, or if I could, I would definitely say that the price difference of £300 or whatever if definitely not worth it.
     My point is, why pay so much money for items that you know your not going to get your money's worth out of, and just buy cheaper stuff? Ok, things that are going to last you years and years, or even a lifetime like a  piece of jewellery you had on a special birthday or wedding/engagement rings and the like, yeah, go ahead, spend a couple of hundred on those, but when I see people paying £15 for two pairs of socks, it makes me wonder if these people have their priorities right.
 

Religion

     Ok, before I start, I want to point out that I am an Atheist. I have not always been an atheist, I was brought up going to church every Sunday with my father, until the age of about 10 (mostly due to the fact that I thought getting up at half 8 on a Sunday was a jip). I can't remember if I even believed that there was a God. I'm not going to lie, I did like going to church and Sunday school, but for the stories and the singing, not for the worship. By the time I was around 13, I was agnostic, mostly due to the fact that my father and his parents are Christian, so I suppose it was a way of keeping them happy, even though I never spoke outright that I wasn't sure if there was a God or not. By the time I was 18, I had made up my mind, and came to the conclusion that there is no God. Before I proceed, I have little problem with religious people, people can believe what they want to believe, just as the fact that I believe that the big bang happened, does not mean that this is the definite truth, but in my eyes, this is the closest we have at the moment.

     The thing that get on my nerves about some religious people is that they totally discredit scientific evidence that we have evolved from monkeys. These people have no problem in believing that fire occurs when a fuel, oxygen and heat come together, or that oil cannot be mixed with water, due to very different properties of the two substances, yet, when it comes to the theory of evolution, they totally discredit it. There are fossils to show that we have gradually evolved from monkeys, yet we still get the phrases "why are there fossils missing between this humanoid and this humanoid?" and "If we all evolve, then why has things like the crocodile not changed for millions of years?" Well, how about if we just look at the history of humans that we definitely know from history records. Ok, we haven't evolved in terms of personal appearance, but when you think how our society works today, and our intelligence today, it is a lot different from a little as 500 years ago.

     And what the hell is the thing with the church not accepting homosexual individuals? Correct me if I am wrong, but to my knowledge, there is nothing in the bible that definitely states that you must hate homosexuals in order for you to get into heaven, and that if you are one, your not going to heaven. Now, I HAVE seen in the bible specifics where it is fine for a man to rape your daughter in order for yourself to be saved from debt, and also that it is perfectly acceptable to have slaves, yet no Christian ever mentions these thing, nor practice them (one would hope). 

     It's those who pick and choose what to believe from the bible that also makes me wonder why they even believe in the religion. If your going to believe in something, then you can't pick and choose what to believe, otherwise, surely, your going against the teachings of God, and will go to hell?

     I am currently studying evolutionary psychology in University, and although my Dad knows about it, it is not mentioned between us, as he does not think that this is true. Ok, I'm not saying that every single thing that is written down in a evolutionary psychology book is absolutely correct, but within everyday life, there is evidence to show that this maybe the case. We have a tail bone, but no tail, some people have genetic mutations, and end up with horns or tails growing. If we were 'made', then surely we wouldn't see these kinds of genetic mutations occurring.

     There is NO proof that God, or any other sort of higher being existing, whereas there is SOME evidence to suggests that we have evolved. How can you totally disregard these scientific facts when you rely on so many others? 

     Yes, I suppose it is a nice thought to think that there is an entity in the sky that has made us in his/her image, and looks over us, and so on, but I genuinely think that religion is just a comfort blanket to those who cannot come to grips with the fact that we are (possibly) alone in the universe, life has no real purpose, and that when we die, we just merely cease to exist. Depressing, I know, but that's why you have to make the most of your life, not waste it worshipping some entity that may not even exist.

   

     

Drink

     Within our society today, binge drinking is seen as something that encapsulates our generation of youths and young people. It is fairly common sense that this is not a good look for our country, as it makes us out to be good for nothing people that have no thought for anyone else. Needless to say, the government sees extreme binge drinking as a severely damaging social and cultural aspect to the country, yet, it is well in their power to decrease this growing problem.

     I was on my way back to the city where my University is from my home, and as I can never eat breakfast at 7 in the morning, so the fact that it had gone 9, and I hadn't eaten, I walked into a McDonald's, to get some food. I'm not really fussed on the breakfast menu in McDonald's, so I asked for a Happy Meal, before realising that they don't start serving them until half 10. This then triggered something in my head. I had just walked past a chain pub and restaurant, silently judging those who were already taking a sip of their first pint of the morning. 

     It is a sad day when you realise that some establishments will serve you alcohol at 9 in the morning, but you have to wait until half 10 for a Happy Meal.

     I'd imagine those who are hovering around the bar at 20 to 9 in the morning already have an alcohol problem, but surely offering alcohol that early in the morning can only lead to more people developing these problems. As most people start work at 9 in the morning, I would expect these people wouldn't allow themselves to be a little late for work, just to get in a quick half pint before work. However, imagine if the serving time of alcohol was changed to only half an hour earlier, how many people would we see in the pubs in the morning having a pint instead of a cup of tea and toast?

     As a student, cheap drinks when I am out is all well and good, as for me this term, money hasn't even stretched far enough for me to buy enough food, let alone any "luxuries". Anyway, There is one place that I frequent quite often, and on a particular night, drinks are insanely cheap. I can buy a double of any spirit with a mixer for about £1.60. I have been to other places, usually on a Saturday night, and I've paid more than £6 for the sane drink. Although I think £6 is extortionate, no matter how many times I go to my usual place, I'm still slightly taken aback when paying for my first drink, that it is so cheap.

     For people like myself, I see the nights where drinks are ridiculously cheap as a way of saving money, I'd take 10, maybe 15 pounds out with me when drinks are that cheap, and that money would be for my takeaway and taxi home too. However, others see it as an excuse to spend just as much money as they would if they were paying twice as much for a drink, so that they can get even more drunk.This is the problem with these sorts of deals. I'm not Miss Angel here either, I have been too drunk in the past, but whereas I can count all of those times on my two hands, other people are too drunk every night they go out, and I personally think that the early opening times, late closing times and cheap drinks are at least partially to blame. 

     There is another establishment where I live when I am at University that offer any drinks (single shots) for 99p. Now, where I can't seem to buy a bottle of pop anywhere nowadays for anything less than £1, to buy an alcoholic drink that is cheaper makes little sense to me. Thinking back, I have been in a pub with my family before whist having Sunday dinner. I had a lager with my food, and then had a lemonade afterwards. In the same pub, I only paid 20p less for a lemonade than a lager, and when I came back to the table, my parents said "oh, well you may as well had another drink". In my opinion, soft drinks need to be at least half the amount of the cheapest alcoholic drink, apart from the fact that I know that from one syrup box used to make the drinks, that costs about £5, then can get about 100 cups of drink from, so charging £1 for a soft drink would still give them huge amounts of profit.

     The fact that the government goes on about binge drinking, and that binge drinking is commonly on the news and documented in television shows, in reality, the government isn't all that caring about it. The fact that it is them who allow for establishments to sell such cheap drinks, serve them for 9 in the morning until up to 4 or 5 in the morning in some other places, is just a clever, but malicious way of generating more revenue.   

Drugs

     So we all know that certain drugs are bad for us, and even those designed for medicinal purposes can cause fatalities. However, one thing that still puzzles me, is why alcohol and nicotine is legal for those 18 of over within the UK, but any other 'bad' drug is illegal.
     It is medically proven that alcohol and nicotine are some of, if not, THE most addictive and damaging drugs that are available, yet these are the ones the government allow us to use. Before I get into this, I am not condoning the use of drugs, I just think that the laws against drugs are ridiculous, and need to be adjusted. Seriously, any grown person with half a brain knows that any amount of any drug is bad for you, so why is there a need for laws against them? Yes, there should be laws against selling minors drugs, just as the law is for alcohol and nicotine, but if you can't get to adulthood, and not realise that shooting speed into your body with a needle that somebody else has used is a totally stupid idea, then its your lookout. If you think that it is perfectly fine to do so, then do so.
     I know that the laws are there to limit the amount of drugs that are available on the street, but lets face it, how many people do you know who want to take drugs say "Oh, actually, I'm not going to take those drugs because the government tells me not to".
     Yes, you could say that the laws are in place because drugs ruins lives, families friendships, and so on.....but when has alcohol never been associated with violence, theft, rape, murder? You can't pick and choose what can and cannot be legal, just because alcohol and nicotine brings in so much revenue for a country.
     As a fairly frequent drinker, personally, I don't see anything wrong with drinking, but only in small amounts, and to an extent, it is only suited to a small number of people, but alas, we cannot divide the country and say "Well, you can't drink because you beat your wife, therefore drinking may make it worse".
     There is a big debate on whether cannabis is a safe drug to use, and whether it should be used for cancer patents to cope with pain and while undergoing chemotherapy. I have researched a lot into cannabis, partly due to my academic studies, partly out of personal interest, and compared to alcohol and nicotine, it is pretty harmless. OK, I'm not going to be the person who says "Oh yes, taking cannabis is totally safe", because it's not. Lots of research has found that those who are heavy users of the drug for prolonged periods of time are more likely to develop illnesses such as severe paranoia and schizophrenia. Yes, I would agree with this, but this does not mean that everyone will end up like this. Those who develop these disorders may already be pre-disposed to them, therefore we can never put these kinds of findings primarily down to the drug.
     Due to the incredible stubbornness and overly politically correct world that we live in, I hardly think that the laws of drugs is ever going to change. Even more depressing, is that although alcohol kills around 15,000 people in the UK alone, due to the money it brings in, we are never going to see another prohibition.
   

Haters

     A friend on Facebook just posted about how she hates the fact that people hate artists, just because other people have said that they also hate them.
     Lots of these people haven't properly heard or seen these artists, so I too, have very much annoyance towards those who say that a band or artist is not up to scratch, purely on the basis that someone else thinks so.
     I come from a group of friends where my music tastes don't always match theirs, and by damn do I know about it. Some of them will go on and on and on about how such and such band doesn't have any musical talent, and that such and such band are just copying the bands that are good. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but when it is constantly shoved in peoples faces, that is when people get upset.
     I have to be honest, there are a lot of classic bands that I don't like, possibly due to not listening to them that much, or that their style of music doesn't really appeal to me. Some people who say I am crazy for not absolutely loving classics such as Iron Maiden and the such, but its just an opinion, and its not something I bring up unless others bring it up.
     Last year, one of my house mates loved indie music. Personally, I think that it is a very boring genre, bar a few exceptions, and therefore do not listen to or like it. However, I did not bring this up every single time I saw this person, although, the first time I was asked by that person if I liked indie music, I said no. A simple no. There was no, "well, such and such are boring" or "such and such have no musical talent, its just all chords", even though I thought this about some of the bands, I did not express them. However, when this person started ripping into the music that I like, saying that its all screaming and shouting, then of course, I will say how I feel about that persons music, as retaliation.
     The worst is when people gang up on you. If you are the minority in a group of people, then its hard to put them down about the music they like, because majority always wins. Ok, so I confess, one of my favourite bands is My Chemical Romance, had been since I was about 15. But guess what? Some of my other favourite artists include Mindless Self Indulgence, Jamie Cullum, and Nicki Minaj. Just because I like one band that you may think stink, does not mean that you will not like the rest of my music tastes.
     One thing that, well, annoyed me more than anything, was when My Chemical Romance were bottled off-stage at Download in 2007. IF YOU DON'T LIKE THEM, DON'T WATCH THEM. I have been to many gigs in my life, and has been to about 4 where Bring Me The Horizon, a band that I really don't like has played. Do I boo them and throw stuff at them? No. I let those who want to see them watch them, and have a good time, while I go and use the restrooms, get a drink and so on. Granted, I do moan to those I go to the gig with, who also don't like them, but lets be serious, your never going to like every band or artist on the entire planet. Those people on stage are human being too. You may not like them as a band, or even as people, but they still have feelings. Saying hurtful things does not count as constructive criticism.
     The one thing that annoys worst thing of all, is when people get so fed up of others basically bulling them over their music tastes, that they stop publicly sharing that they like those artists, and sometimes even change their own music tastes to suit the majority. Whatever happened to liking whatever you wanted?